To avoid talking politics with friends or co-workers, try the “white flag approach.”
As November’s general election creeps closer, it’s likely that more political discourse will seep into your social gatherings.
For many Americans, these discussions can be uncomfortable, especially if their political leanings differ from those of their friends.
In 2020, almost one-fourth, 22%, of registered voters said they have friends who support a presidential candidate they do not, according to data from Pew Research Center.
There are a few ways to handle unwanted political talk, says Matt Abrahams, a Stanford University lecturer and communications expert.
The key to seamlessly navigating political discourse when you don’t want to discuss your views is to “signal understanding, but not necessarily agreement,” he says.
Here’s how.
Use the “white flag approach.”
The term “white flag approach” was initially coined by Rachel Greenwald, a matchmaker and author of “Find a Husband After 35: Using What I Learned at Harvard Business School.”
It is a play off automobile racing, where waving a white flag signals to the driver that they are starting their final lap. You can apply the same concept to social interactions, Abrahams says.
State that you’re going to have to leave the conversation soon, then ask a question that steers the discussion away from politics.
For example, you can say:
“I’m about to head to the bar to grab another drink, but before I go I wanted to ask you about that trip to Italy. The pictures look amazing.”
Listen intently and then make your exit.
Share “criteria” but not positions.
Instead of saying where you stand on certain issues, just comment on how important they are to you.
“Essentially, you share the criteria or the particular areas that will impact your voting without saying who you are voting for,” Abrahams says.
He suggests the following transcript:
“I absolutely plan to vote. My vote will depend on each candidate’s plan for the economy and where they stand on student loan forgiveness.”
Ask questions.
Paraphrase the other person’s view and ask how they arrived at that conclusion.
“Questions of clarification or open-ended questions get others talking,” Abrahams says. “You can ask questions of others without revealing your positions.”
The goal is to appear agreeable without actually agreeing with anyone.
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